From pandemic to platforms: raising resilient kids in a shifting world

T his Care Visions Family Talk explored one of the biggest questions facing parents and carers today – how do we raise steady children in an unstable world? Hosted by Dr Linda de Caestecker, former Director of Public Health for Glasgow, the session featured two authoritative guests: George Hosking OBE, criminologist, psychologist and founder of the WAVE (Worldwide Alternatives to Violence) Trust, and Danny Henderson, Head of Development at Care Visions Scotland.

Why prevention matters: George’s journey

George explained how his career changed course three decades ago. He left international business behind, retrained as a criminologist, and began working in prisons with violent men. “All the ones I worked with had suffered significant abuse in childhood,” he said. Those experiences led him to found the WAVE Trust, dedicated to preventing child abuse, neglect and domestic violence before they ever happen. For the past 30 years, George has been at the forefront of campaigns to transform early years support and break cycles of trauma.

Are we facing a youth mental health crisis?

Linda asked whether the UK is now facing a mental health crisis among young people. George's view was clear: “There is something of a mental health crisis. And the pandemic does seem to have been one of the triggers that has set that off.”

Danny added his perspective from three decades in residential care: “The lockdowns actually created an environment where young people were just functioning in the present… the kids that we were looking after felt like the pressure had been lifted off them.” But, he said, once restrictions ended, pressures returned – especially around education and technology.

Platforms and pressure: setting boundaries

Technology was identified as a major problem. George warned: “It’s a tremendous pressure, and it’s addictive… if we don’t set boundaries, it begins to dominate their lives. And unfortunately, for the most part, it dominates in a negative way.” He cited evidence from Scotland showing that levels of happiness among children have “deteriorated significantly in the last 10 years.”

The first 1,000 days: brain growth and attachment

George highlighted the importance of the first years of life: “A baby’s brain adds new connections at more than 1 million per second… That means the brain is incredibly malleable during that period, but it also means it’s incredibly vulnerable.”

Secure attachment in those early years, he explained, provides a “buffer against the later problems that come along.” Without it, children are more likely to develop addictions, poor mental health and relationship difficulties.

The power of one

One of George’s most powerful stories came from interviews with people facing multiple disadvantages such as homelessness, addiction and mental illness. Almost all gave the same answer when asked what would have made the biggest difference in their lives: “Someone who believed in me.”

“Just one person makes a huge difference,” he told the audience. “Give them a belief in themselves by making it clear that you believe in them.”

Regulate yourself to help them regulate

Danny stressed the importance of carers managing their own emotional state: “Much as we need to be attuned to them, they’re attuned to us as well… so we should try to maintain that stability, that calm to make sense and respond rather than react.”

George agreed: “If you get triggered into reacting, things just escalate and go wrong from there. So being calm and staying calm… enables you to deal with the situation in a way which is not reactive. Because if you become reactive, you lose control.”

George reminded carers they cannot do this work if they are depleted: “You can’t pour from an empty cup… it’s important that you find things you do that regulate you and have someone you can talk to that just sets you back down to base zero again – because you’re probably doing a very good job even though you think you’re not, because if you are giving that child belief in itself then you are doing something absolutely priceless.”

Four skills that underpin positive outcomes

He also outlined the four key skills linked to positive life outcomes - executive function (mental skills to manage daily tasks), self-control, emotional regulation and a sense of agency - all built on secure attachment.

Transforming Scotland in a Generation

George is co-leading the Transforming Scotland in a Generation project, which argues that investing in early years is the most effective way to tackle trauma and disadvantage: “The character of a society is determined by the character of the children of the future. If we can change the character of the future children of Scotland, we can transform Scotland.”

Takeaway Messages

• Set boundaries with technology -bphones and platforms are addictive; children need adults to limit use.
• Early years are vital - secure attachment and attunement in the first 1,000 days are the strongest buffer against later problems.
• Believe in children - even one trusted adult who champions them can change a life.
• Stay calm - children mirror your emotional state; calmness helps them regulate.
• Look after yourself - carers need support, rest and encouragement to keep giving.
• Push for change - George argued prevention must move up the political agenda, with investment in early years as the key to breaking cycles of trauma.